Why The Horde Sucks.

In my days I have gone to see quite a few metal/hardcore bands from A Day to Remember to Veil of Maya. At each of these shows I have had to endure some pretty poor performances by opening bands, But none as horrible as The Horde. Ok so picture this your standing on the show floor waiting for the first band to play and you see 4 guys walk out. The first is about 7 feet tall with a small beer gut and long wavy hair with a drunken stagger. He looks to be about 50 something years old and he is wearing a black sleeveless shirt that says death to rap on it. The second is very short with a hunting cap on and a really round waist line. he kind of looks like the girl from willy wonka when she turns into a blueberry except hes a greasy older hairier man. The third has gray pulled back hair and is also round around the stomach and has a kind of sleepy appearance. Finally the fourth just as round as the other 2 walks out looking very proud and confident. As I am witnessing this i think to myself oh god i hope this isn't the band. Sure enough It was and the vocalist carrying his bass guitar steps up to the mic. In a loud high pitched obnoxious voice he introduces the band, "Hello Iowa City!!! We are THE HOOOOOORDDDAH!" Then they start the music with a very unenthusiastic presence. As you listen it all starts to blend together in a very awkward ugly way. The drums repeat the same rhythm without any good fills, the guitars play dirty basic riffs with the occasional mediocre solo and the vocalist just rips your ear drums open with his girly scratchy whining. As if that isn't enough to make you want to give up on music forever than just wait till you hear their lyrics, they are nothing you couldn't find on the back of a diablo 2 box. They rant about vikings and witches and skulls, I'm sorry at this day in age no person in their right mind is going to want to listen to a flabby old whiney man yelp on about witches and skulls. All in all this is why The Horde SUCKS!